


Give Me That

by mtac_archivist



Category: NCIS
Genre: Gen, Humor, Not Episode Related, Not a Crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-08
Updated: 2007-12-08
Packaged: 2019-03-02 06:19:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13312266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mtac_archivist/pseuds/mtac_archivist
Summary: Tony has lost his book.





	Give Me That

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Jessi, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [ MTAC](https://fanlore.org/wiki/MTAC), an archive of NCIS fanfiction which closed in 2017. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after August 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator (and this work is still attached to the archivist account), please contact me using the e-mail address on [ the MTAC collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/mtac/profile)

  
Author's notes: Takes place after episode 5.02: Family but no spoilers  


* * *

“Where is it Probie?” Tony demanded as he tore apart his desk.

“Where’s what?” McGee asked as he walked over to watch Tony’s distress more closely.

Tony rounded his desk to face McGee, “You know damn well what I’m talking about! Give it back.”

“Tony, maybe if you told me what I supposedly took, I might be able to help you find it.” McGee stated patiently as if talking to a small child.

“McGee!” Tony said angrily, “Don’t play innocent. You’ve coveted my black book ever since you found out about it.”

Tim laughed, “Tony trust me, I have no interest in dating any of the women who have found their way onto your list of conquests.”

Tony paused sensing the truth in what McGee had said, “Then where is it?”

“Is this what you’re looking for?”

Tony and McGee turned in unison to stare at Ziva. She was sitting at her desk paging through Tony’s little black book.

“Ziva,” Tony said menacingly as he crossed to stand in front of her desk, “hand it over.”

“Tell me Tony. What do these little symbols next to the Women’s names mean exactly? Are the stars better than circles? Some of these women have both. Why is that?”

“None of your business.” Tony reached across the desk and tried to snatch the book from Ziva. She scooted away holding the book above her head and out of his reach.

Tony scrambled around the desk attempting to trap her. Ziva evaded him and slipped into the center of the bullpen placing McGee between her and a charging Tony.

Tony lunged around McGee as he reached for Ziva. All he ended up with was an armful of McGee.

Ziva backed away laughing, “Is McGee in your book, Tony?”

“Hey,” McGee balked at Ziva's words as he struggled to free himself of Tony’s awkward embrace.

Pushing McGee out of the way, Tony stood facing his nemesis, “Very funny, Ziva.” Tony changed tactics, “Please give it back.”

“Why would you need such a book any more, Tony? Is this a custom of all American men?”

Tony tried to slowly close the space between them, “I wouldn’t know. I just want mine back.”

Ziva waved the book out of Tony’s reach as she kept moving away from him.

“Do you have a similar book, Tim?” she called over Tony’s shoulder

McGee looked shocked at the suggestion, “No of course not!”

Smiling Ziva nodded, “Ah, this is because you are a virgin.”

“I am not a virgin,” Tim snapped.

Tony stopped and chuckled, “Probie wouldn’t need a book; just a small index card.”

Ziva added her laughter to Tony’s.

Tim looked at his two teammates, wondering how they had suddenly joined forces to pick on him. “Can you two leave me out of this conversation?” he demanded grumpily.

“Don’t feel bad McGee,” Ziva said with mock sincerity, “Let us see if there is someone in Tony’s book for you.” Still keeping the book away from Tony, she began to recite some information from a random page. “Ah here is a good one, Staci with an ‘I’. She has three circles and two stars.” Looking up at Tony, she asked “Is that good?”

Tony smiled at the memory of Staci, _yeah that was good_. Without answering he lunged once more and trapped Ziva against Gibbs desk. She was bent backwards over the desk with the book extended up, over her head. Tony pressed his body against her as he attempted to reach up and grab the book. They stared into each others eyes, faces inches apart and breathing heavily from the exertion of the chase.

The moment stretched between them. Finally Tony’s fingers closed on… air. He looked up to see Gibbs holding his book. Ziva and Tony jumped off his desk and straightened themselves up, “Hey Boss,” Tony stammered, “this isn’t what is looks like.”

Gibbs sent them a steely-eyed glare calculated to elicit squirming, “Oh really DiNozzo and what does it look like?”

“Well, I mean…” DiNozzo looked at Ziva for support.

“What he means Gibbs, is that we were simply sharing information.” Ziva stopped. “You know what, I’m just going to go finish my paper work.” Abandoning Tony she slinked back to her desk.

Gibbs waited silently, eyes fixed on Tony.

Tony pointed behind him at his desk, “I’m just going to go over there.” He turned and walked slowly back to his desk.

McGee had his hand over his mouth trying to stifle a laugh.

“Something funny McGee?” Gibbs asked.

“Ah, no Boss.”

“Good grab your gear we have a case.” Gibbs smiled as he watched the three of them trip over themselves to gather their stuff. “And DiNozzo?”

“Yes, Boss?”

“Get rid of this thing.” Gibbs tossed the book at Tony as he headed toward the elevator.

“Sure thing, Boss,” Tony smirked as he tucked the book back into his desk and followed his teammates to the exit.


End file.
